Cashing In
by dantesdarkqueen
Summary: Another reject from Evidence of Sephiroth's Humanity. Ever wonder what Seph did with those sex coupons Kandi gave him for his birthday? Booze, smut, and partnerswapping galore! Nobody below 18, please


**Summary: **Another perverted reject from my "Evidence of Sephiroth's Humanity" fic, this one centers on a set of sexual vouchers Kandi gave Seph for his birthday, booze, and partner-swapping. Kandi with Seph? Akalara with Zack? And everybody has been drinking??? What insanity and smutty goodness has been unleashed?!

**Disclaimer: **Me, no own. You, no sue. Kandi, AmazonTurk's. Akalara, mine. Seph and Zack, Square Enix's. Understand? Good. Repeat: no sue. Monies no mine. Broke college student. No monies.

**Queen's Quornor: **Amazon really needs to stop giving me ideas like this. First we have "Return of the Green Sludge," and now this. Yeah, I know I said in the summary that it's a rejected idea; what I mean by that, before you get angry, is that it's too racy and sexual for the original fic. I'm trying to keep "Evidence" under the T rating, so anything that is too sexy and racy gets thrown in with the M-rated oneshots. Anyway, in her latest review for the aforementioned original, Amazon mentioned that Seph still needs to cash in on the vouchers her character gave him for his birthday. Well my fellow Queen, today's your lucky day! This is the insanity that results when you combine booze with sexual vouchers and four _very _willing participants! And as a special treat, this is probably the closest I'll ever get to writing full-out yuri.

**Usual Warnings Apply:** if you aren't 18 or older, or are offended by things like this, then what the hell are you doing reading this? Get back to the story listings _immediately _lest your innocent eyes be scarred by the smutty goodness about to unfold!

Cashing In

"Seph, question. What'd you do with those vouchers I gave you for your birthday?" Kandi asked, raising a fifth of scotch to her lips.

"They're around somewhere," the silver-haired man replied, taking a swig of prime Icesicle Inn vodka. "Why?"

"Just wanting to know why you haven't used them yet."

"Why would he want to? He's got me." Akalara drank some tequila, doing body shots off Zack's stomach.

"And you're currently sucking on my boss," Kandi pointed out dryly.

"Well, you're ogling mine," the green-haired woman retorted with a grin.

"It's not like I mind, Kandi," Zack said, licking a trail of salt off Akalara's collarbone. He took a drink of the tequila and bit into the lime slice she had stuck in her mouth, grinning around the wedge.

"You don't mind girls licking any part of your body, period," Sephiroth snickered, putting his vodka aside. "But since you're so curious, Kandi..." He opened one of the drawers on the bottle-strewn coffee table and pulled out a thick sheaf of pink papers. He flipped through them before ripping one out and handing it to her with a flourish.

Kandi took it and glanced over it, her eyes flashing mischeiviously. "You want me to make out with somebody else while you watch?"

"Yeah." He reached for his vodka again.

"Ok." The red-streaked brunette looked at Zack, but then went to Akalara. "C'mon, Green Girl. Let's get show our men that we don't need them to have fun."

"Remember the position?" the younger woman inquired naughtily, swinging herself around on the couch sideways and loosely crossing her legs.

"I worked at the Honeybee, remember? That position was second-nature to me for a few months." Kandi settled herself between the other woman's legs and crossed her own behind Akalara's back, moving her hips until she found the correct, most snug placement. Zack and Sephiroth watched and drooled as the younger woman brought her hand to the elder's face in a soft caress before the two engaged in a heated kiss.

"Sweet Shiva..." the black-haired man groaned. "Tell me they're going to take off the shirts."

In reply, Kandi slid her hands down Akalara's torso and slowly drew up her tank top, pulling it over her head and to the floor in one swift movement. Akalara followed suit, extricating her friend from her sleeveless white Oxford by unbuttoning the front and sliding it off. Once the shirts were off, they wrapped their arms around each other once more and continued their make-out session uninterrupted.

"Bras too," Sephiroth commanded in a low, dark voice. "Let me see those beautiful breasts of yours pressing against each other."

The two women didn't pay the general any mind. Instead, making sure they could see what she was doing, Kandi trailed one hand down Akalara's side and slid it into her jeans, making the younger woman gasp into her mouth. Akalara followed suit, using her left hand instead of the right so the men could watch. "Oh, that's good, Ak," Kandi moaned.

The SOLDIERs looked at each other, and nodded before getting up and going to the busy, intwined women. "Ok, ladies, I think you've had enough fun for tonight," Zack declared, pulling at the first woman he reached, which happened to be Akalara. Sephiroth took hold of Kandi, and together they yanked the women apart.

"Kaaaannnddiiiii!" Akalara whined, reaching out for the brunette.

"Aaaaakkk!" came the reply and outstretched hands. Sephiroth snorted and dragged Kandi over to the armchair, waving the vouchers in her face to shut her up. Her eyes locked onto the one on top, a voucher for a blowjob, and she licked her lips hungrily.

Zack slung Akalara over his shoulder and watched his best friend and secretary with amused purple eyes. "Hey Seph."

The silver-haired man glanced over his shoulder at him. "Yes?"

"Since you're so busy with my secretary, wouldja mind if I had some fun with your girl?"

Sephiroth waved a hand at him, fending off Kandi's attempts at unfastening his belt. "Not so fast. Off with the bra, first."

Kandi smiled and tugged her bra off over her head, freeing her breasts from confinement just as Zack carried Akalara over to the dining room table and laid her down atop it. "So what would you like me to do for you, General?" the red-streaked brunette asked in a sultry voice.

"Let's go with the classic," he said, ripping out the blowjob coupon.

"All right," she said with a grin, grabbing his hips and jerking him closer.

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Akalara was just a bit too drunk to honestly care who she was with at the moment. She just wanted someone to send her through the roof before the night was over, be they male or female. Kandi had been good until she had been so rudely yanked away, but the green-haired woman had no true complaints. Zack was standing at the edge of the table between her knees, yanking off his shirt and her jeans. She sat up and scooted closer to him, kissing him hungrily as she felt his fingers beginning to unfasten her bra. The moment the garment was off, he broke off and leaned back, purple eyes roaming across her body and face.

She smiled and arched her spine so her proud, 36C breasts were shown in their best possible light. Being only just over five feet tall, was it any wonder men were always so pleased to find that the short woman had such a large rack? "Like what you see?" she purred, running her hands over the nipples and cupping her breasts in her palms.

"Fuck yeah!" Zack enthused, bending down to take one pink nipple between his lips. Akalara sighed happily and threaded her fingers through his spiky hair, arching her back for better access as his free hand pinched and pulled at the opposite nipple. His talented tongue slid around her stiff little nipple, trailed across the split between her breasts to the opposite one, and did the same to that neglected nipple. Akalara's head went back, feeling the effects of the tequila she had downed combining with her growing arousal. A thought suddenly occured to her, and she smirked.

Catching Zack off-guard, she pushed him off her and leaned forward, wrapping her arms around his torso and holding him steady so she could slide her hot, wet tongue over his own nipples. The hardened SOLDIER immediately froze, shocked by the intensity of the unexpected feeling. As long as he had been screwing women, nobody had ever done _this _to him before, not even Kandi. He was helpless to do anything more than wind his fingers into her dark green locks and groan like a wanton while the red-eyed vixen laved at his chest, suckling and biting with as much intensity as he had given to her.

She nipped and sucked along his collarbone to his neck, finding the sensative spot he had thought Kandi alone had known about with ease. He shuddered when her teeth grazed it before moving up to his ear.

"Do you find me sexy, Zack? Are you..._aroused?_" she asked, using that low, sexy tone of voice he loved to hear.

In reply, he pushed her back down to the table and leaned over her, pinning her arms to the surface with one hand and reaching the other down to her wet thong.

"Baby, you don't know the meaning of the word," he growled, tearing the skimpy underwear off her in a single swift jerk.

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Sephiroth was going to die. He was fairly certain of this fact. Kandi was going to kill him.

He had thought Akalara was the best at blowjobs...

He had recently become aware of the fact that he was sadly mistaken.

Akalara was good...

But Kandi was better.

It had only been a minute since he had shown her the coupon, and she had already gotten him rock-hard. At the moment, her cherry-red lips were stretched tightly around his shaft as she deep-throated him, her hands holding his hips steady as her head bobbed up and down on his length. Akalara had never managed to deep-throat him before; he was just too long and thick for her to get more than the head in. So he found it beyond hot that his best friend's secretary had managed to take it all without batting an eye. To make things even better, Kandi made a point of swirling her tongue around the sensative head whenever she backed off.

Oh yes. She was going to kill him. No doubt about it.

She drew him out of her mouth and wrapped one hand around the base of his shaft, ducking underneath it to suck his balls, making Sephiroth gasp loudly and clutch her hair even tighter. "Good enough, General?" she inquired, smiling up at him.

"You're such a witch," he hissed, still staring at the ceiling. "An absolute damned witch!"

Kandi grinned naughtily and rose up off the floor, settling back down in the armchair and snagging the half-empty bottle of scotch. "So what next, Seph? Those coupons let you do anything you want to me."

Sephiroth responded by diving to the floor and ripping off her shorts and panties, making her squeal in surprise. Grabbing the bottle of scotch from her hand, he flashed her his patented wicked smirk and slung her legs over his shoulders. "I don't need a coupon for this one," he purred, pouring the alcohol between her legs and setting the bottle aside before spreading her wide and diving in, pink tongue searching out each and every drop of precious scotch hidden in her folds. Kandi's hands flew to the arms of the chair, nails tearing holes in the fabric as she fought to keep her orgasm from rising too fast.

Akalara had always bragged about how good Sephiroth was at eating pussy, but Kandi had never really believed her.

Now she did.

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Akalara was having some oral fun of her own at the moment. Zack still had her wrists clamped tightly in one hand, but right now her hands were held prisoner on top of her slim belly; the SOLDIER had had to drag them down her body so he could hold onto them while he applied his skillful tongue and free hand to her sopping folds. Unable to hold onto anything but her own skin, the Turk-in-training was helpless against the pleasure racing up and down her nerves. She writhed and tossed her head from side to side, moaning and groaning worse than any porn-star as Zack's tongue slid between her folds and over her clit, three fingers repeatedly plunging in and out of her dripping entrance.

She was so close... But the evil, evil man between her legs wouldn't let her come! Every single time he felt her begin tightening around his digits, he stopped pleasuring her until the threat of orgasm had passed. The moment he was certain she was no longer on the cusp, he would return to licking and fingering her. Akalara's pleading filled the air, but he paid them no heed.

At last, she reared up and fixed him with her best death-glare, her cranberry-red eyes glowing with the strength of her fury. "Stop torturing me and let me _come!_" she snarled.

"You want to come?" He chuckled. "Fine. I'll let you get off the same way Kandi always does whenever I'm with her."

In one swift move he pushed her back down onto the table and took his hand off her wrists, bringing them to his mouth and sucking on the first two fingers to get them wet. Resuming his oral activities and scissoring his fingers inside her, he made sure she was good and distracted before he made his next move.

Akalara's eyes widened and she let out a shriek as those saliva-soaked fingers plunged into her ass.

She had never been touched _there _before. Sephiroth had expressed interest in ass-fucking her, but she had always turned him down simply because he was _so damn big. _And none of her previous lovers had ever taken her that way. As experienced as she was, her second virginity was still intact.

But she didn't have time to react to the slight pain; between Zack's hands and mouth, she was finally coming and coming _hard_. Her back arched off the table and she could swear she saw stars in the ceiling as she screamed her pleasure to the light above.

As she was coming down from her orgasmic high, Zack stood up and pushed his pants off his hips, purple eyes glittering as he waited for her to regain some sense of where she was and what she was doing before he started fucking her.

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The other couple in the apartment was already well past that point; Sephiroth had torn out another voucher and, at Kandi's insistence, taken her place in the chair. Right now, the brown-haired secretary had her knees on either side of his hips, eagerly sliding up and down his thick pole. She braced herself against his chest, head falling back as his hands crept up to her breasts and tease at the nipples. It was almost a return to her days at the Inn; most of her customers had preferred to let her stay on top, wanting to let someone else stay in control for once while they just sat back and enjoyed the ride. Only difference was, she wasn't wearing the damn costume.

No big loss. The stinger always annoyed her, anyway.

Still bouncing on his lap, Kandi slid one hand down to massage her clit, needing the extra stimulation to reach her own orgasm. Sephiroth, to her surprise, sat up and shoved her hand away, his own taking its place between her legs while his teeth ravaged her shoulder and neck. The secretary gripped his shoulders, her nails digging into the pale flesh and her face twisting into an expression resembling that of extreme pain. Sephiroth, knowing how badly she needed it, hooked her hips and slammed her down atop him, hard enough that the head of his shaft rammed against her cervix. The combination of pain and pleasure provided exactly what she needed, sending her orgasm crashing down onto her. Kandi screamed at the same moment Akalara did, filling the apartment with ear-splitting noise.

"Hey Seph! Wanna keep your banshee under control?" Zack yelled over his shoulder.

"Isn't she _your _banshee?" Sephiroth shouted back. "And anyway, speak for yourself! Your tablemate is making just as much noise as mine!"

Another scream erupted from Kandi as her silver-haired lover arched up into her, pressing directly on her clit at the same time, making her come again.

"Seph! Get a fucking gag!" Zack yelled.

"I've got a better way to shut her up!" Fisting Kandi's red-streaked hair, Sephiroth brought his mouth crashing down on hers, forcing her to keep moving even as a third orgasm rocked her body.

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On the other side of the room, Zack was only just beginning to take Akalara. Her long legs slung over the crook of his arms, she was clawing at the table while his hips slammed into hers, her cranberry eyes screwed tightly shut in her passion. And the SOLDIER wasn't just doing linear thrusting; no, he had to be the showoff. His hips churned, corkscrewed, twisted, shifted up and down, and basically wreaked mayhem on Akalara's insides.

Leaning down turned out to be a mistake. The Turk-in-training locked her legs around his neck and yanked him down by his hair for a brutal kiss, biting at his lips and shoving her tongue into his mouth. Zack growled in complaint and grabbed her hips, holding her absolutely still for his ravishment. His body stabbed harder and faster into her own, and his movements were close enough to her that her breasts rubbed against his chest with every stroke, providing additional stimulation.

It didn't take long for Akalara to tear her mouth away from his and throw her head back in a primal, deep-throated scream. Her body tightened around Zack's, holding him in place and flexing around him until his back arched and his head went back, his roar of release joining her shriek.

"Zack! Gag!" Sephiroth yelled from his place against the wall. He and Kandi had moved away from the chair, and currently the brunette secretary was pinned between a painting of Wutai and an enlarged snapshot of Sephiroth's first military squad.

"What for? We're done already!"

A long-fingered hand fisted in his hair once more. "Oh really?" the owner of the hand purred, yanking him back down atop her.

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Kandi was fairly certain Sephiroth was going to kill her. Ex-Honeybee or not, she could only go so long! Right now, he was practically boring a hole in the wall with her body as a chisel; she could almost feel a dent forming behind her whenever he thrust into her. He was using so much force, the pictures on the wall were moving!

He was almost animalistic in his passion. Akalara had told her he could get like this sometimes, but she certainly hadn't been expecting to experience it herself. Here she was, holding on for dear life while he shoved in and out of her, her ass digging a hole into the wall...

And she was _loving it!_

Hanging onto his neck, she keened when his fingers slid between her wide-spread legs, finding her clit and stroking the tissues stretched around him with singular purpose. Shoved higher and higher up the wall with each new thrust, she felt pressure building quickly.

Just a little more...

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Akalara put her head down and groaned in mingled pain and ecstasy, her fingernails gouging holes into the table as her grip tightened. On her hands and knees, she was starting to wonder if this was such a good idea after all. Zack was on a chair behind her, holding her hips at the very edge of the table while he slid into her ass on an excruciatingly slow, steady thrust. He had used their combined juices as lube, and while it was slippery enough, she had long since forgotten what it felt like to lose her virginity. That may have been a different orifice, but it still _hurt_ to lose it, no matter which opening was being stretched open for the first time.

Zack was being extremely careful, as gentle as he could be, but that didn't change the fact that he was still shoving his cock up her virgin ass. He wasn't quite as big as his superior, but he was still pretty large compared to most men. Sensing her discomfort, the SOLDIER had a sudden flash of inspiration; he reached under her and rubbed her clit, halting his thrust for a moment. Pleasure overided the pain, and Akalara relaxed a little, allowing him to slide deeper inside her. He was almost fully inside her when the pain escalated again, and upon feeling her tense up again Zack immediately rubbed her again. This time he managed to get all the way inside her before the pain returned.

Giving her a moment to adjust, he leaned forward so his lips were near her ear. "Ready?" he whispered.

Wordlessly, she twisted her head around so her lips met his in a passionate kiss, her hand leading his up to her breasts.

Zack pulled out and thrust back inside, but almost immediately he noticed a problem. He couldn't get much force or purchase from this position. Maybe it was the fact that he was on a chair while she was on the table, but he just couldn't get the power he needed to really make this feel good. "Hope this table has strong legs," he muttered, pulling out of her and climbing up to lay down on the table, turning her onto her side so she was spooned against him. A little more juice scooped from between her legs, and he was back in business, moving against her while his hands explored as they wished. Akalara twisted her head and back, allowing for another kiss full of teeth and tongues. As things got faster and harder, the table started making creaking noises, but they didn't pay it any mind.

Feeling his orgasm rising, Zack wrapped his arms around his green-haired lover and buried his face against her neck and shoulder, hooking one leg over her hips and planting the foot against the table to allow greater force while he thrust. Akalara clutched at his arms, moving with him as much as she could and slinging one arm behind him in an attempt to encourage him to go faster, harder.

Their climaxes hit them at the same moment Sephiroth and Kandi screamed from their release against the wall, the impassioned cries of all four lovers filling the apartment almost at once.

Completely devoid of energy, the two couples sagged into relaxation where they were, holding their partners comfortably in their arms and just enjoying the afterglow.

The apartment had a comic's sense of timing. No sooner had they all relaxed than the pictures fell off the wall and the table collapsed.

Sephiroth and Kandi looked over at the table, Zack and Akalara twisted their heads to look at the pictures. Then Seph and Kandi looked at the pictures, and Zack and Akalara looked at the wreckage they lay on.

They all just laughed.

Post-orgasmic euphoria was always good for preventing apocalyptic fury.

"You're all going to have to pay for these, you realize," Sephiroth forced out between laughs.

"For this experience? Heh. Priceless, Seph, priceless," Zack shot back playfully.

"Doofus," Kandi murmured, snuggling into Sephiroth's chest.

"Retard," Akalara echoed, pulling Zack's arms tighter around her.

"Perfect?" Zack asked.

"Yes," Sephiroth replied.


End file.
